A Golden Tapestry



"He's asleep again," a young voice giggles. "Shush," is his mother's response. "But M-o-o-o-m" whines the little boy, "he'll miss the cake!"

The crowd of 11 is gathered around the oak dining room table just finishing a dinner of pot roast, potatoes and carrots, Jon's favorite. Jon's two sons, William and Rudy, sit at one end of the table drinking beer and discussing the fight that was on CNN the night before. His daughters-in-law, Dail and Joan are clearing the dishes as his daughter, Sherry, wipes the last of the pureed version of Jon's birthday dinner from his chin. Some small residue seeps from the corner of his mouth just as she thinks she is done.

"Gross!" a second young voice chimes.

"Now you stop that," Sherry retorts. "You know your grandfather can't help it. He's had a stroke. Besides, do you want to hurt his feelings?"

"Oh, Ma, he's sleepin' anyway. Besides, even when he's awake, he still doesn't know what's goin' on half the time."

"William," Sherry responds, "that's enough. Go help clear the table so we can have birthday cake."

With that, the 11-year-old sighs and begrudgingly proceeds to start picking up the dirty white linen napkins, making a game out of how many he can hold in one hand. Sherry leaves Jon's side and sits down to pour coffee for her husband, David, and proceeds to engage in the table conversation that has now turned to a heated discussion about the O.J. Simpson trial which has recently dominated the news.

Jon lets out a little snore as his head jerks back. The crowd ignores his abrupt resonance and continues their intent conversation. Holding a small object in his good, right hand, he slowly rubs his thumb back and forth over its surface. This is something Jon does through most of his waking hours. No one really pays much attention to it anymore. As far as they are concerned, it is just one of those odd things he's been doing since he became ill.

The left side of his body is completely paralyzed from his infirmity, and he can't seem to stay awake these days for very much time at all. It is difficult for Jon to understand everything that is happening in his life now, because he is often in a state somewhere between waking and sleeping and he has lost all track of time. He spends a lot of time remembering, though. Remembering things that grasp at his being and open wounds that he thought would have been closed years ago...