Chapter 1 - And So It Goes


Hi, I am Annie Berry. Im single, twenty-six years old, and I live in Portland, Oregon.

I havent always lived here, though. Growing up, my dad and I traveled for his job in the military. Then, when I was about twelve, we moved to Idaho for a while to live with my Nana Berry on her farm.

Things were going pretty well. I went to collegethats where I met Gretchen. We had the same major, graduated together, and moved to Portland for work. Thats where shes from.

We did everything togetherworking, playing, volunteering you name it, until she met Max and moved to Singapore with him. Now my world is upside down.

* * *

Journal entry June 6th, 1996

Gretchen came to town for my 26th birthday...I havent seen her in weeks. We used to spend all our time together, but ever since she met Max things have changed between us. Now she is gone. She moved to Singapore this summer to spend more time with him. I know things are bound to change in relationships.... but I miss her like crazy.

We went to a community tree-planting event to celebrate my big day. They allowed me the honor of planting a tree as a birthday gift. While we were planting it, Gretchen remarked on how much Id grown. She said that when we had worked together I seemed distantlike I was always running around with my nose to the grindstone and that when we go out planting or cleaning up the parks, Im practically a different person. What a funny thing to say.

* * *

Gretchen and I spent the rest of the weekend together. We visited with friends, went out to lunch and played at the park. I did feel a bit like a different person. Prior to now, I hadnt been having much fun.

When I drove her to the airport on Sunday evening, I gave her a kiss goodbye and she was gone again.

* * *

Journal entry June 9th, 1996

Gretchen left today. My heart aches just thinking about it. We had such a good time...like old times...it made me wish she never left.

It is different when shes around. She could be right.

* * *

The next month just about flew by. Work, work, work and more work. I barely had a chance to think.

It was Sunday, mid-July when I decided to volunteer at the animal shelter again. I hadnt been back there since Gretchens big move.

Gretchen and I used to care for the cats. In spite of this, I signed up to walk dogs today. The change might do me good.

Zo, one of the staff, gave me a demonstration then monitored my interactions with the dogs. She wanted to see how they responded to me.

My first one-on-one dog walk was with a black lab mix, called Theo. He was soft and sweet by nature and right away my heart went out to him.

I took him outside and we walked around the whole yard. He stopped to smell every flower and watered every tree. It was hard to bring him back inside.

The rest of the day went on, dog after dog. My legs were tired from all that walking and at 9:30 p.m. I called it a day. Signing back out, I waved goodbye to Zo.

Back at home I pulled up the ad proposals on my computer. Work was extremely busy and I always felt behind, no matter how much I did.

It was 1 a.m. when I finally shut the computer down. I slipped into my pjs and crawled into bed with my journal.

* * *

Journal entry July 14th, 1996

It was a beautiful day. I feel like Im back on track. Working hard, volunteering to help the animals. Things feel like they are looking up.

Im beat, cant write anymore right now. Good night!

* * *

The next morning, I set off for work. Normally my day consisted of rushing here and hurrying even faster over there. Multi-task was my name and motto. Today was no different. I was working on a big ad campaign for a pet product company, Peteys Inc.

Sybl, a co-worker, was helping me with a mock up for their campaign. My mind started drifting off. I was thinking about what I had to do later and making lists.

Annie, are you okay? asked Sybl.

I focused back to what we were doing. Oh, yes. Im fine, I replied.

The truth was I wasnt fine. I was distracted. Since Gretchen left the company, it was hard to be there.

I drudged through the rest of the day. At five oclock on the nose, I left.

Later in the evening, I stopped by the shelter to volunteer again. Debbie was on staff tonight.

Hi Debbie! I called through the screen door.

Hey there, Annie. Come on in! she called back to me. Nice to see you back again.

I signed myself in and started to head towards the cat clubhouse.

Zo mentioned that you worked with the dogs yesterday, she said leading me into the dog area. Can you help out in there again, Annie?

I guess I can, I said.

Debbie handed me a leash and practically pushed me over to where Theo was kenneled.

Why dont you start here, she said and walked away.

I looked in at Theo, his big eyes staring at me.

Okay, I said.

Theo and I went for a walk about the yard. He was quiet and peaceful. I could feel myself relaxing. Really, I didnt want it to end. It felt like we could hang out forever.