Addicts appear in all shapes, colors, ages and sizes. Addiction knows no boundaries and it subtly cuts, sometimes quickly but usually slowly, through all walks of life, rich or poor.

There are people addicted (slaves) to cocaine, heroin, work, excitement, sex, beauty, anger, alcohol, education, religion, television, prescription drugs, worry, depression, debt and abuse (physical and emotional). You possibly can add something to the list.

If you are not content or happy by yourself or with yourself, ah hah no cheating now, that includes total silence with the boob tube off, it's possible your life doesn't have the balance necessary for true peace...something is missing. It is my perception, without even meeting you, that the missing link is love and acceptance of yourself, just as you are...for some reason you are GODVOID. Now, chew on that one awhile. Don't you just love new words?

Also it is my view that a healthy dependence on God and daily contact with that spirit of love and acceptance which lies within me, not out there somewhere or in a building, a job, money or in another person or anywhere else that this society has tried for years to lead me, or perhaps I should say, tell me to go, provides joy, intrigue, excitement and especially humor.

The GOD of my understanding is synonymous with LOVE and Love is synonymous with ACCEPTANCE. Acceptance of myself, you, indeed everything in this world just as it exists today.

This does not mean that I like everything as it exists. It also does not mean that everyone likes me as I am.

My personal journey with life has led me to the conclusion that we are the most miserable when we are either beating up on ourselves unmercifully, allowing someone or something else to hammer away at us or beating up someone or something else. Perhaps we are obsessed with winning a fight, and most of us don't know what we're fighting for, who started the fight or why we're trying so hard to win a battle that in the end becomes meaningless anyway.

And the most vicious, destructive battle, indeed the war that drives us insane at times is the conflict within, the dueling voices in our heads and hearts...it's a killer.

The Addict is a story that had to be written and is dedicated to all of my children. This introduction is dedicated to family members, friends and former friends as a public apology should you have crossed paths with me while I was on a roll with booze, women, work, depression, anger, worry, day dreaming, fantasizing or all of the above either separately or at times, simultaneously.

While growing up in a small farming community I used to hear the elders talk about a certain townsperson who just "wasn't all there." I was one of those who "wasn't all there."

But in my defense and in defense of other addicts, which includes much of the earth's population in varying degrees, I would like to share my personal perception that it is a daily, indeed minute-by-minute challenge to remain "all there" while living and working in an achievement-oriented society, one that is making almost impossible demands on mothers and fathers at the expense of today's children.

Also, living and working in a world that continues to spin out of control energized by a Godless or Loveless vacuum, is an especially lonely journey once an individual has truly been smitten with the desire to share a bit of laughter, warmth, love, understanding and acceptance, indeed God, with fellow travelers.

It seems at times an almost impossible solitary feat to live in a material world that is overwhelmed by and permeated through and through with the seven deadly sins of pride, greed, anger, lust, envy, gluttony and sloth. There is a constant bombardment a programming from well-meaning friends, neighbors and the popular media to "measure-up" ie: (Always be strong, brave, virile, sexy, vulnerable, intelligent, tough, sensitive, fast, mean, kind, laugh, cry, win wars, lose graciously, masculine, feminine, competitive, giving, relaxed, intense etc;) WHAT AN ORDER!

I confess I was on a mission and couldn't stop and smell the roses, had a little trouble adjusting to life and I didn't like nor did I listen to many of the values you were trying to teach me. But I appreciate much of the help I had in embracing a few key assets along the way and confess it has taken me a long time to learn some hard lessons.

You were right. Life is not fair, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a dull girl, there are no free lunches, talk is cheap and the road to hell really is paved with good intentions.

There is some time left now for me to play and I plan to do that and never again will I attempt to grow up. It's boring...being a grownup.

This book is about one life, one soul that was sold time and again in an attempt to amount to something, to be somebody and it has been an expensive and lonely journey.

Addictions, compulsions, obsessions, co-dependencies? Buzz words of today but words who's meanings and realities have been passed through generation after generation in an achievement-oriented world, a vicious world that at times seems to have no love or compassion at all for we, the children.

I see too many sad eyes, too many angry eyes, too many eyes full of fear, loneliness and blank stares.

In the past my favorite women were truck stop waitresses. I still like waitresses. They work hard and most of em know how to sweat real classy like. I fell in love with a waitress here not too long ago. The conversation that led to my tumbling head over heels in love with her was brief and went like this. Jim: "I believe in God but it's kind of a personal thing with me." Mona: "I believe in Love.".....It's a matter of terminology you beautiful young woman, we're on the same path.

I always thought I would be a farmer or cowboy but somehow I've ended up writing for what some would say is the most prestigious news organization in the world. Somehow I've wound up living amid tremendous wealth stretching from my condo about two blocks east to Lake Michigan and substantial poverty and drive-by shootings roughly four blocks west of me.

It's been one hell of a trip so far and when I die, all of you are invited to a special post-life rock and roll dance and feast.