All legends have a beginning. This one, the legend of Ribeye the Bullbarian, began many, many years ago in a time-forgotten age, amid the thick sprawl of a great forest in the kingdom of Baloni. It was here on a muggy fall morning, somewhere well off the civilized path, that two Bullbarians made slow progress through a tangle of densely packed foliage and majestic oak trees.

The bull named Ribeye led the way. His mighty sword ripped open a forward path through the relentless undergrowth. He was a hulking example of Bullbarian strength; his stocky six-foot frame rippled from head to hoof with beefy muscle. He had a boyish face and many would say he was a very handsome eighteen-year-old bull.

He towered over his kid brother Cubesteak, who scurried along on a pair of tiny legs, bringing up the rear. Cubesteak was a mere babe of eight years, who appeared to be a wide-eyed and innocent waif, though many would say he was anything but. The younger Bullbarian carried a small wooden practice sword tucked in his waist belt, and a folded knapsack. He broke the silence and exclaimed: Yuck! Weve been slogging through this mess for days! You know big bro, maybe next time itd be a lot easier if we just took the civilized road through here

Ribeye responded with his usual headstrong and boisterous tone. Bleh! Forget the civvie road Cube. That leads to the one thing I wanna avoid as much as possiblecivilization!

B-but this is the worst part of the forest!

Exactly where a Bullbarian should feel right at home!

Cubesteak shrugged. Whats the big deal with all this Bullbarian tradition stuff anyway? Im more of a modern Iron Age kid.

Ribeye frowned, and slowed his pace. Thats the trouble with the younger generation of Bullbarians these days. Yer growin up with no sense of yer proud Bullbarian heritage.

Yeah, well, I love it when you teach me all the neat stuff like breakin things. Or how to swordfight. Bullbarian stuff like that is cool! Its just that I mean

What?

Well, just that civilization isnt so bad either

Ribeye groaned. Such was the Bullbarian generation gap.

The two slashed onwards, a few hard earned feet at a time. The rough journey took them through the clogged heart of the forest. Finally, Ribeye felt his sword clank against something hard and unnatural just beyond a dense thicket. He parted the brush to get a better look, and both bulls staggered back, gasping in bewilderment.

A high wall of green limestone towered skyward some thirty feet; it was capped by a series of pointed stones, resembling a fearsome row of teeth. The bizarre barrier stretched off into the brush an undetermined distance, effectively blocking their path.

Cubesteak reasoned: Folks usually put up walls like this to keep us Bullbarians out!

Ribeye chuckled. And of course, ya know what that means!

Umm that maybe we should go around it?

The larger bull shook his head, grinned, and tested the wall for hand and hoof-holds.

Cubesteak shuddered. I dunno, you really think we should climb over Ribeye? I have a bad feeling about this place!

Ribeye's focus narrowed. The only feeling I got is that this wall is way too thick to smash through so we'll haveta go over it!

Cubesteak groaned.

Come on lil Bro. Since Im teachin ya how to be a true Bullbarian, this is the perfect time for ya to learn how to scale this type of annoyance!

Cubesteak knew there was no point in arguing. Ribeye tackled the wall, using slight crevices between the stones to pull himself up. Cubesteak followed his lead, searching the wall for a good place to begin his upward journey.

Ya gotta think like a spider, Ribeye reminded the younger bull.

Just great. So to be a true Bullbarian, I need the brain of a bug!

Ribeye stopped halfway up the wall to check the progress of his younger sibling. No, no, he instructed, hug the wall tight, otherwise yer gonna fall! That's it! Dig yer hooves in. Now reach up for the next place to grab hold!

Cubesteak tried, yet lost his grip and fell back off the wall. He crash-landed into the underbrush with a muted thud.

You okay lil' bro?

Cubesteak poked his head up from the bushes. This is ridiculous. There's gotta be an easier way! He glanced around. The few tall trees nearby were too thin even for a small bull to climb.

Bullbarians don't look for an easy way, Ribeye tutored, we look for the

Yeah I know, I know the Bullbarian way!

Bingo! Now get up and try it again!

Cubesteak groaned. I just know this is going to lead to nothing but trouble.

Long minutes later, after much effort, Ribeye reached down and pulled his younger brother up beside him at the top of the wall. Not bad climbing Cube! Not bad at all!

Cubesteak fought to catch his breath. I still say there's gotta be a better way!

Both bulls sat motionless for a moment, enjoying their minor victory. Somehow, it hadn't yet dawned on either to turn and look toward the walls other side, where suddenly an odd hiss rose from out of the unknown. They turned and were greeted by a fur-raising sight.

A large open courtyard stretched before them. A living mass of brown and white with countless pairs of large, glowing yellow eyes undulated on the stone paved floor. Ribeye thought it must be a single gigantic beast, but on closer look, he made out the individual shapes of several hundred closely huddled creatures. Owls! An army of em!